V For Vivacious Virginia
by nuannaarpoq
Summary: This will be Morgan/Reid slash. Janine, Reid's wife leaves him and their two-year-old twins. Morgan's been in love with Reid for years, he decides to be a more important part of his life. Reid is oblivious.
1. Revelations

1. Revelations

It was a very tiring day at the BAU and everyone tried to catch up on their paperwork, not wanting to bring it home-well, except for Reid, but he was busy with the files "secretly" slipped on his desk anyway. When they were finally finished, Emily was the first to speak.

"Alright, guys, who wants to grab some dinner?"

"I do. I haven't been anywhere in weeks and Will's looking after Henry tonight" said JJ.

"Me too. Jack is at his grandparents' for the weekend."

Garcia, Morgan and Rossi agreed too, and they looked at Reid expectantly, but he gave them an apologeticsmile.

"Sorry guys, not tonight."

Morgan looked at him impatiently.

"C'mon, Reid, you've got no more paperwork and your books won't go anywhere. It's just dinner."

Reid mumbled something inaudible, fumbling with his messenger bag's buckle.

"What'd you say, kid? Couldn't hear you."

Reid looked up, fidgeting, clearly unconfortable.

"I said I'm not spending the night with my books" his voice was barely louder than a whisper.

"Could it be that our little Reid has a date?"asked JJ with a smile.

"Yeah" Reid mumbled.

Garcia practically squealed, her eyes sparkling with excitement.

"Do you think it would be possible to provide information about the identity of the lucky lady who stole my G-man's heart?"

"Her name is Janine, and it's just a date, Garcia, and considering my former luck with women I'm pretty certain there won't be a second one. So I'm not going to give you her last name, because I'm sure that would be enough information for you to dig up practically everything about her."

Garcia didn't look broken at all. She actually looked mischievous.

"Oh honey, trust me, I don't even need her last name to do that."

Morgan tried his best to grin at him.

"Good for you, kid. The first date of your life is a really important occasion."

"Ha-ha" Reid looked at him with a scorn. Morgan was still grinning.

"Anyway, I don't want to be late, so I have to go. Have a nice weekend, everyone."

The girls wished him good luck, JJ giving him a last advice about trying to reduce the amount of randomly spluttered facts, then he left.

"So, shall we go?" asked Rossi.

"You know what, guys, I uh, I forgot that my neighbor who usually looks after Clooney isn't in town today, so I gotta get home. Sorry" said Morgan.

Everyone nodded, and Garcia shot him a worried look but didn't say anything.

They all exited the building, each of them looking forward to the weekend. Well, most of them.

Later that night

Derek Morgan's phone rang. He knew who it was without looking at the screen and he knew he needed the forthcoming conversation. He pressed the green button.

"Baby girl."

"Hello, my Greek God. Are you okay?"

He considered his options and chose to go the shorter way: no lies.

"No."

"Oh honey of course you're not. If I were you I wouldn't be either. And I hate to remind you, but we've talked about this before. You didn't expect him to die a virgin, did you?"

"Of course not, and I knew it'd happen eventually but it's still hard, y'know?"

"I know, dear. But it's still not late, you know that, right? It's not like he's getting married, it's just a date. I've told you a thousand times before but you should talk to him."

"I know, but I can't, Penelope. You know I'm a coward. It's never happened to me before. I mean, I've shared my bed with a couple of guys, but it was always them who initiated, and I went along with it only for the sexual release, but I've never had feeling this strong for anyone. No girl ever made me feel this way."

"I can see that, baby. That's why you should talk to him."

"But I'm terrified, Penelope. You're the only one who knows, and as long as I keep it in myself, it might be just a silly fling, but if I tell him, it becomes reality, and no matter how many times I've played that scene in my head, who knows what'd happen in reality. And I'm not the after-me-the-deluge kind of person, at least not when it comes to my personal life. Not to mention the tiny little detail that Reid likes girls."

"So do you, darling, I might remind you. And yet it doesn't mean anything. And how is a year-long crush a fling? Be honest to yourself, honey, you're dreadfully in love with our little Dr Spencer Reid."

"I wish you were wrong, Garcia. I wish you were wrong."


	2. Separations

2. Separations

3 years later

Derek Morgan considered himself a very patient man. He was waiting and waiting, not pushing anything yet making sure that he looked at hime encouragingly often enough to make him understand he was more than welcome to talk to him anytime. But maybe, just maybe seeing Reid so miserable he'd never seen him before, not even after Hankel broke Morgan's heart so badly that he wasn't sure if he could wait any longer before he grabbed him and pulled him into a bone-crushing hug, so he finally persuaded himself that whatever it was, he'd get it out of him because he clearly needed somebody's help.

But deep down, Derek knew it was not just that. The truth was, seeing the person he was in love with suffering made him suffer too, and he wanted that feeling gone. His subconscious also knew that interrogating him would probably do more harm than good, but he couldn't help it. His own pain made him decide this way.

One would say he was selfish; and that is no mistake. But selfisness is the deepest human nature. Selflessness is something we force on ourselves. In reality, we do everything out of selfishness but most of us wouldn't admit it for the life of us. We say we do things to help our friends when we want to inquire acknowledgement or just be able to tell our conscience 'I did my best to help them'. That's what Derek Morgan did when he got up from his table and followed Reid into the restroom. The boy was standing in front of the mirror, head bent down, fingers grasping the sink so hard his knuckles were white.

"Reid?" Morgan tried to say his name as gently as he could but Reid gave a start anyway. He didn't look up, still grasping the sink as hard if not harder. Morgan took a step closer to him.

"C'mon kid. Talk to me."

Reid was still being quiet, and it didn't take a profiler to tell that the last thing he wanted to do was talking to Morgan.

"You've been like this the whole week. It's terrible to see you like this. You're my friend and I care about you."

He paused because Reid seemed to stiffen a bit and then he finally raised his head. He looked straight at Morgan, and there was so much hurt and anguish and exhaustion in his eyes that for a very long moment, Derek felt all these feelings flood over him. That was when he realized that Spencer hadn't looked him in the eye for the past week, and now that he was, Morgan could tell that whatever was consuming his friend, it was something he needed help with.

_If I don't help him_, Morgan thought, _he might start taking Dilaudid again_. His stomach clenched at the thought, and he mentally pulled himself together to speak again.

"You've been walking around like a living corpse. Everyone can see you're not well. We all care about you and want to help you, pretty boy."

"No, you don't!"

Reid snapped so suddenly that Morgan almost jumped.

"None of you cares about me."

His voice was tired and broken.

"You're just curious. That's how people are. You're pretending to be sympathetic when all you want is to hear every little detail of your life. To hear horrible things. That's what keeps people alive. I can't trust anyone. Everyone's selfish. They will all leave me in the end."

The end of Reid's outburst was a whisper, and now he was covering his face with his palm.

Morgan should have known better than getting hurt about what Reid said, but he couldn't help a jolt of pain flush over him. The pain in his chest caused by Reid's miserableness was stronger though, so he tried his best to remain calm.

"That is not true, kid. It may be in some cases, but we're not like that. We're your friends. Your true friends. I don't know what's happened to you now, but I am aware of your past injuries and none of us would ever betray you. But you also know that, and I refuse to get hurt by what you just said. I want to hear your problem_ because I want to help you_. We all do. You can't handle this alone."

Reid looked at him with an apoligetic expression, and his eyes still shone with vagueness, but Morgan's words seemed to encourage him enough to finally talk to him. He cleared his throat and his face suddenly changed. All feelings vanished from his face, and the look of pride appeared on his face. Like he was about to say something that he wanted to say with confidence, like it deserved no feelings.

"Janine left."

"What?"

Morgan was taken aback. He had thought about everything-his mother's condition got worse, he forgot how to capture books with his mind-but not this.

"Why?"

"I don't know."

His voice was trembling, and that was when Morgan couldn't keep himself from closing the space between them and pulling him into the tightest embrace. Reid didn't even stiffen. _He had gotten used to people being close to him_, _that definitely makes it easier to help_, Morgan thought. He didn't cry, but Morgan could tell he was devastated. Saying out loud what he probably hadn't even said to himself definitely upset him. They were standing like that for what seemed like a very long time for Morgan when Reid's breathing finally seemed to calm down.

"So, are you ready to tell me what exactly happened?" Derek asked as he slowly let go of his friend and took a step back to look him in the eye.

Spencer sighed and started to talk.

"She's been cheating on me. For more than six months. That if she wasn't lying, it could be more, I don't know. She lost love for me long ago, you know. We haven't been arguing for a very long time, and that just confirms it even more. I don't think I ever had more heated conversations than in the first year of my relationship with Janine, but I was never happier. There's no happiness without tears, they complement each other. But feelings slowly passed away, and she became nonchalant. Only Leon and Rosa kept us together. But it seems like even they weren't that important for her, considering that she chose a fifty-year-old childless businessman over them."

"Woah, woah, wait a minute. You mean Janine left the twins too?" Morgan had a hard time processing all the information.

"Yeah."

"When exactly did she leave?"

"Saturday morning."

"Have you heard anything from her since then?"

-No. She said she'd call as soon as she'd settled things, but appearantly it hasn't happened yet. However I have a suspicion that she won't be in a hurry. She was never a good mother, you know, I was always the one to look after the children. She didn't even _want_ children...I was the one forcing it. And that's when we started to drift apart. And now she's gone...It's crazy, Morgan. Even though I know she is not good for the children I still want her back. Even though I know she doesn't love me, I still love her. How is this possible? Why am I the one to suffer and why doesn't she? It doesn't make sense."

Reid's voice faltered. Morgan decided that he had learned enough. He couldn't answer his friend's question but he knew that by any means necessary, he would help him through this. After all, Spencer was important to him for more than ore reason: he was his best friend and Derek also happened to be in love with him.

Important, please read this: First I'd like to thank everyone who read this. You make me happy! I'd be SUPER thankful for reviews! This is my first fanfiction ever, and English is not my first language. Writing in English is hell of a lot harder than I thought, damn. Also, I might have spelling errors, grammatical mistakes, syntactic errors, etc. So if you see any, please let me know! Oh, and this is supposed to be more humorous than dramatic, despite the fact that the beggining may seem a bit depressing. Also, I'm sorry for the philosophical stuff about human nature...it just popped into my mind while writing and then I put half of it into Reid's speech so it'd fit more into the story. It might happen in the future so tell me if you don't want me to do it haha. I'll upload the next chapter as soon as I can. That's about it. Please review!

Lora


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